Studies Show Being Gay Is a Mindset, and a Choice

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Created: 06 May, 2015
Updated: 15 Oct, 2022
2 min read

Being gay is a choice. But in today’s world, it can be difficult.

Over 60% of us scroll through Facebook, Instagram, and Tumblr everyday. And in doing so, it is easy to spend considerable time comparing ourselves and our lives to the happy outtakes of others.

Then, when we look in the mirror, we don’t think our selfie looks as good as Shana’s pic on potato chip rock doing a hand-stand and the splits at the same time -- all while eating the vegetarian curry she whipped up in the morning.

I can’t even keep myself from eating a hotdog at the baseball game!

Then I catch myself – at least I get to go to a baseball game.

Then I drop the ball – I should be hiking up potato chip rock instead of eating a hotdog at this baseball game!

And the cycle continues.

We compare, contrast, and condemn ourselves for not living up to the moments of our peers’ self-congratulations. And so the wandering mind continues to wander, comparing our circumstance to possibility. Running down cul-de-sacs of what-if and what-could-be.

And as the mind whirls, happiness stands on the road we travel, not on the trails we wander. As several recent studies have shown, happiness is being content with who you are, where you are, and what you have – not the wonder of what could be.

As psychologist William James put it, “The greatest discovery of any generation is that a human can alter his life by altering his attitude."

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So what do we take from this?

In a world of social window shopping, it is easy to spend your life looking at things you can’t afford, or worse, things that aren’t even real.

But those who have the discipline to stroll down the street enjoying their own cup of bitter coffee, not fretting over the little bulge that hangs over their belt, and not wondering about things a wandering mind can’t afford have accomplished something more than most…

… just being gay.

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