Instead of Legalizing Same-Sex Marriage: Get The Government Out of All Marriage
By Conor Murphy | 05/19/2012 | Issues | 39 CommentsOnce again, the issue of same-sex marriage has awoken from its three and a half year hibernation cycle, and graced us with its presence during this 2012 election season. Last week, President Obama made the announcement that he believes “same-sex couples should be able to get married.” One thing the President did not mention was of the top ten most important issues facing this country, same-sex marriage does not make the list.
The federal government is over fifteen trillion dollars in debt, the U.S. military is stationed in over 130 countries around the world, the dollar is losing its value faster and faster, and yet voters and public officials are arguing about whether or not two men can get married to one another.
As it happens, both sides of the same-sex marriage issue are fundamentally wrong in their approach. Supporters and critics of same-sex marriage both start with the assumption that government needs to regulate marriage. The problem with this premise is that marriage is a private institution and it is often times religious in nature.
Regardless of the nature of a marriage, it is not up to the discretion of the federal government to interfere with such a personal relationship. Regulating relationships between consenting adults is an act of government overreach. This should also apply to heterosexual marriages as well. Many people forget that it was government involvement in marriage that made it possible to ban inter-racial marriages. No matter what kind of relationship an individual desires, heterosexuals have just as much right to not be interfered with as homosexuals do.
The government’s primary responsibility is to defend our rights and to uphold the Constitution. When the government chooses to regulate the institution of marriage it shirks those responsibilities. Marriage is a voluntary association between consenting adults which hurts no one else and should not be regulated by the federal government.
No where in the Constitution does it mention anything about marriage. According to the Ninth and Tenth Amendments, any power that is not explicitly given to the federal government in the Constitution is reserved for the people and/or the states. This means that if marriage is to be regulated at all, it needs to be handled at the local level.
Not only is marriage a personal and private issue, but it is also a religious institution as well. The First Amendment expressly forbids the the government from regulating religion which in turn prohibits the government from regulating marriage. To prevent an individual from marrying the person they wish is just as wrong as compelling someone to pray a certain way or keeping them from attending a specific church. Regulating marriage is not only unconstitutional, it is also morally and ethically wrong as well.
Another one of the few constitutional responsibilities of the government in a free society is to enforce private contracts between individuals or groups. Often times a marriage is accompanied by some sort of legal contract. If two (or more) consenting adults enter into a contract with one another, it is not the business of the government to deny those particular individuals that right.
When it comes to the issue of marriage, conservatives should be philosophically opposed to government regulation of such a private institution. Ironically, it is the so-called conservatives who advocate for more government interference in marriage. So-called conservatives have become proponents of more regulation, less privacy, and less religious freedom. While social conservatives lament over the sanctity of marriage, they overlook the true cause of the problem. Homosexuality is not a threat to the sanctity of marriage. The real threat is government.






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39 Comments
mary-margaretmc-dowell
05.19.2012
@mary-margaretmc-dowell
Excellent article Conor,I love your work.Government is too involved in our personal lives, we need to change that,and we will.
Lucy Baltsen
05.19.2012
I agree that Government should not be involved in this issue…so are you saying then that all people should be afforded the same rights as married people when it comes to healthcare benefits, social security and claiming each other on a joint tax return??? That is where the Government does have to get involved….
atheistcolby
05.19.2012
@atheistcolby
The flaw that i see is that you assume all marriage is a religious affair. Mine is a private affair between me and my wife. We also have government protections since we are married and a small tax break. The religious part of it is extra for those that want that it is not a mandatory.
Gaye Hoots
05.19.2012
Agree. There should be a complete seperation of church and state. Weddings should be defined and performed by a persons preferred church. The states should define and perform unions and the ensuing contracts. Thue if a couple want the legalities to pretain to or protect them they need a union. Otherwise, a wedding is recognition within their church. Divorces would only be granted for unions as no church that I am aware of sanctions divorce.
Noël Barna
05.19.2012
Yes! Everyone deserves to be happy or miserable in marriage.
Talon Gaudio
05.19.2012
i think the government should only do civil unions… and marriages should be from the church.
Patrick Kiff
05.19.2012
Sorry nothing but to divert attention away from real concerns such as his birth certificate investigation.
Mike Morrato
05.19.2012
Government has controlled marriage since before the colonies. It was through the state supported, controlled and run churches. Folks can argue that it was always a church thing only that is wrong. To be a member of the clergy required approval (license) of the state, bishops were often appointed by the state and opposing/new light sects likewise needed approval from the state before even preaching much less officiating a ceremony.
But no, the state should not keep out or we will end up with 50 different laws and 50 different sets of recognition and generally a big mess of it all.
Mary Hackett
05.19.2012
I agree with Talon Gaudio. Gov. civil union. Church marriage. Christians can’t and shouldn’t control what the secular world does, only our own.
Gloria Vazquez
05.19.2012
So if that is the case — polygamy should be ok and polyandry and marrying children, etc? Come on, we have to have some laws.
chuckthomas
05.23.2012
@chuckthomas
Consenting adults deserve to rise or fall on the weight of their on decisions. Get the government out of the marriage question.
stephanieneuenschwander
05.23.2012
@stephanieneuenschwander
Children cannot marry since they are not consenting adults. As for polygamy, who cares how many wives a man takes, that’s his personal business and doesn’t do a bit of harm to the general public any more than same sex marriages or heterosexual marriages do.
If you don’t like polygamy, don’t be a polygamist. Simple as that.
Felix Bunke
05.19.2012
Well, I’ve long thought that the legal side of marriage should be called a “civil union” for ALL couples, to emphasize that it’s just a legal contract, different from the religious / ceremonial side, which is what most people think of when they think of “marriage.” I think if that distinction were made clear, it’d also be clear that it makes no sense for the government to be saying that couples whose genitals match shouldn’t have the same right to enter into such a contract as couples whose genitals don’t match. Then, government should stay out of “marriage” by that definition and just stick to civil unions. Also, we should stop the blatant violation of the separation of church and state involved in having religious ministers acting as agents of the state in performing legal marriages / civil unions.
Atomic Love
05.19.2012
I couple or single person should pay same taxes per individual any way. And you should be able to list anyone you want as your domestic partner. What other reasons does the government have in sticking their nose in our bedroom?
Roger Ryan
05.19.2012
yes one civil union license for all. I mean as it is now it is breaking the very first amendment. You go to a Civil court house for a religious license to be used in a religious building in a religious service and that has to be signed by a Religious leader and accepted an confirmed by a civil servant in the civil building. If faiths want to issue a marriage license ..go for it and exclude who ever you want. The civil union license covers every thing non religious and the marriage license covers everything religious and nothing non religious. That is what our first amendment secures as a right for both the religious and non religious.
Noël Barna
05.19.2012
There’s a HUGE difference between two grown gay adults marrying and marrying children off.. seriously.
And call it what you want couples whether gay or straight should have all the same rights. They should be able to make important medical decisions etc.. for their other half that you get with the bond of marriage.
Liz Lutzkanin
05.19.2012
I think two people should be able to go to city hall, county court house, attorney etc. to enter into a legal and binding contract, no ceremony, just sign a contract. Beyond that if they want a religious ceremony, they can choose to have one.
Amy Millis
05.19.2012
Agreed! Next subject please!
Cassandra Voight Estes
05.19.2012
Yes!
Nikki Reagan
05.19.2012
I agree! We’re talking 2 adults, it doesn’t matter what gender, this shouldn’t be an issue!
Shannon Black
05.19.2012
The government should NOT be allowed to grant or deny marriages. Period. Stay out of personal contracts unless needed to settle a dispute.
Shannon Black
05.19.2012
Mike M. A bit of REAL history on marriage and the U.S. / Marriage licenses were to establish PROHIBITIONS of certain marriages.
For most of Western history, marriage was a private contract between two families. Until the 16th-century, Christian churches accepted the validity of a marriage on the basis of a couple’s declarations. If two people claimed that they had exchanged marital vows—even without witnesses—the Catholic Church accepted that they were validly married.
State courts in the United States have routinely held that public cohabitation was sufficient evidence of a valid marriage. Marriage license application records from government authorities are widely available starting from the mid-19th century. SOME are available dating from the 17th century in colonial America. But marriage licenses were not required until after the American Civil War. Marriage licenses from their inception have sought to establish certain prohibitions on the institution of marriage.
Daniel Pascoe
05.19.2012
Yes, the Government needs to stay out of marriage all together but what needs to be realized is that excluding same sex marriage the homosexual agenda is pushing for legalized silencing of opposition to the lifstyle. What do I mean by this. Homosexuality is in direct attack on freedom of speach for religious poeple, Jew, Muslim, and Christian. In other countries they (those pushing the forced acceptance of the homosexual lifstyle, not just gays pushing it) have arrested preachers from inside the four walls of their church and have filed law suits againts people who post opinions in opinion pieces in local newspapers. In Colorado a state senator has already managed to pass a state law forbiding any printed material discriminating against homosexuals in anyway this includes the bible and the K’oran. They are fundimentally against free speach and free religion and if people don’t agree with them they bully them into accepting their values on the subject. They have stormed churches in this country and constantly shout down any religious rally in the states. I have not seen any instance in the liberal media (which would obviously show this) of where Christians are trying to shout down or storm homosexual rallies. The one way road of the homosexual agenda is in direct threat to freedom in this country. What is sad is I don’t see anyway to stop it.
stullsy
08.17.2012
Can you get any info, i.e. a link, for me on the colorado state senator that passed the legislation, Daniel Pascoe?
Cassandra Voight Estes
05.19.2012
Get big government out of it… The boils down to the big business of healthcare and other big business with other unhumanitarian actions. I don’t care if you want Mickey mouse listed as your spouse on your insurance, you can have just one spouse and pay the premiums, done! Take away the freakin’ HIPPA restriction that doesn’t allow SSP to be in the room with their ill and sometimes dying life partner.
I don’t like the government involvement. The just see gay couples as dollar signs. That’s wrong.
Barb Happ Zimmerman
05.19.2012
YES!!!!
Shannon Black
05.19.2012
Homosexuals do not have an “AGENDA”, they would like to be left alone to live their lives as they see fit without governments/religious nuts telling them how to live. The right to life, liberty and the pursuit of HAPPINESS. This means whatever one wishes it to mean. But with that, one person’s rights end where another person’s rights begin (meaning harm to another is not your right). Two (or more for that matter) consenting adults should not be hampered to enter into any relationship or contract amongst themselves based on someone else’s ideals or moral values.
Ciro J. Giue
05.19.2012
Yes…
Brenda Caughlin Richmond
05.19.2012
Well said! But what are the chances?
Nicole J Hyke-Cintron
05.19.2012
Everyone is accountable for their own actions. However, our marriage laws are based on Old Testament laws which were written to protect women and their rights-they were designed through religion. Some Middle Eastern Countries still practice pre biblical law. Our laws are based on biblical law period. So unless laws are changed……but of course this topic is used to get votes-we. Have WAY to many other things to do- this is last one on the list. Really Fed oversteps their bounds and this is a State rights issue. Feds are not even taking care of the things they are responsible for.
Joshua Nagy
05.19.2012
I want the Government out of Marriage period. Daniel Pascoe is 100% correct there is an agenda. Christians are not telling anyone how to live, hypocrites are attempting to censor religion and speech. If you don’t like what Churches are teaching then don’t go but the second you want to force a learned behavior onto my children you started a war.
Shannon Black
05.19.2012
Nicole – Our country was not founded on “religious” notions. The Founding Fathers were rather vocal on not imposing religion and choosing instead the freedom thereof. We should not be basing anything on “biblical” teachings or values as christianity is NOT the be all, end all decision maker in a freedom of religion country.
S. Suchindranath Aiyer
05.20.2012
My sentiments precisely. Marriages are made in law, not in heaven. Law is, at best, the product of depraved societies. At worst, the produce of venal lawyers and corrupt judges
Dan Richards
05.20.2012
@danrich
The Federal Government has again over-stepped its ability. First of all this is a State issue and not a Federal one. At max the only thing the Federal Government could do on this point, is if some states allowed it, and some did not, then make it so that all States had to honor the unions as per law between any married couple. That would be the maximum of the Federal ability.
As per state, then it would have to go by State guidelines on how this was made or blocked within accordance of that State’s laws.
But what will likely happen, will be like a lot of things that should not have been allowed; the Politicians will return to the “The Necessary and Proper Clause”, because it will be necessary and proper to get Obama back in Office. Not because any one will believe it is actually justified. If these politicians actually cared one way or the other, and took a real approach to the issue, I would have less concern of it. As it really does not bother me one way or the other. What bothers me more is a bunch of flakes supporting it for political points than willing to take an actual stand one way or the other. And not just play with it like a toy; Obama’s statement that they had not taken a stance on present laws during his term, does not cut it, Grow a pair Mr. President.
Libertarian (aka free American)
05.21.2012
As Americans we must recognize all people’s rights to marriage (a religious rite in almost if not all cultures). I came to this exact solution myself and it is the only one that makes any sense. If we oppose gay marriage we take the rights of many people, but if we support it via laws by the government it will be forced down the throats of institutions who don’t recognize a gay marriage’s legitimacy.
Will
05.22.2012
Government shouldn’t be involve in marriage at all levels: Federal, State, and Local!
EJB
05.26.2012
Unfortunately, ‘getting government out of all marriage” is not a full articulation of an equity principle, and can become a mere platitude. First, let’s start with which level of government in our federalist system the principle is to apply to. If it is to only the Federal level, then there is an immediate differentiation in legal outcomes based upon which state you live in. There are thousands of federal law provisions (for benefits, privileges, immunities, exceptions, and in some cases disqualifications that turn on whether a couple is “married”. If one takes a State’s rights approach (probably more consistent with our Constitutional system, but that’s a legal argument, not an equity argument) then we effectively allow State’s to determine the varied outcomes for federal law, which immediately makes the State’s decision to be an overtly political question. Not only that, if citizen A from Maryland is treated differently from citizen B in Alabama, they are differentiated on a criteria that is often completely unrelated to the purpose of the federal law in question.
If the principle is applied equally to the Federal government and State governments, you solve a big part of the interstate differentiation problem (but not completely, as State’s must still legislate countless ways in which this legally recognized union impacts other aspects of life (torts, contracts, privileges and immunities, property law), not the least of which are divorce laws. The potential for differentiation in treatment remains significant. Furthermore, as a proposal: “get government out of all marriage”, it is difficult to see how, absent a federal mandate, one could force the states to abide by such a principle, given their sovereign status.
Finally, there is the question of social acceptance within a culturally coherent system. This gets complex, but the simple description is that many gay and lesbian’s may want to be “married” (as distinguished from a secularized, somewhat bland ‘civil union’) because of its cultural legitimization of their union. This presents the problem that under no circumstance to we want to be violating the First Amendment by commanding religious recognition of forms of marriage to which individual denominations or religions do not agree.
The one approach that resolves most (but not all) of these problems is a different form of federal mandate. It is one in which the federal judiciary identifies a constitutional claim that governments (at all levels) are prohibited from discriminating in their application of the term “marriage”, including qualification for the legally recognized union, on the basis of sexual orientation (or some other coherent abstraction of the issue). This maintains religion’s ability to conduct their affairs with respect to marriage as they see fit (including if they wish, discrimination against gay marriage) but commands all governments to provide no discrimination based upon such status. This gets to both the definition of marriage problem but also the thousands of methods by which government addresses the consequences of marriage.
Ultimately, it comes down to a question of how you view government’s role in society. As a libertarian, I am immediately attracted to the “get government completely out of all marriage” premise, yet I am that branch of libertarian who believes in strictly limited government, but that one of the fundamental purpose of that limited government is to protect the fundamental rights of individuals. Does a non-discriminatory definition of marriage reach the level of a fundamental right in such a system? I leave that to the reader to mull.
danken
05.26.2012
@danken
When discussing whether or not the government should regulate marriage. The Pro-gay marriage supporters often view this as a fight for equality while those opposed to it view this as a fight for tradition. There are those on both sides of the argument that will hold to their views and consider opposing views as bigotry. But it is possible for those on both sides of this argument to find common ground. Marriage has a foundation, it is created to encourage a healthy union that can produce offspring. I know that not all male/female couples may produce offspring but because natural law requires a male and female to produce offspring we hold this relationship separate and uphold it as a strong tradition. The Constitution of the United States is based on natural law. Those who support gay marriage view the civil liberties of a group of people being infringed upon. There are those that have a tenancy in them that makes them attracted to the same sex though The Human Genome Project, which mapped out and identifies the purpose of the human genome, never identified a “Gay Gene”. Gay is an action, no matter what degree the brain is wired to be attracted to the same sex. Recently the focus of the argument has shifted from behavior to rights though. Despite this skip in reasoning people are being educated to accept Gay as a sort of race and to disregard the individual liberty that every man or woman has. Those supporting gay marriage must recognize the behavioral choice of this topic, while those opposed must recognize the freedom of choice people have with their sexual preferences. Traditional marriage is unique in its purpose but the freedom of choice should not be opposed by the government.
Li Tyler
02.18.2013
@li_tyler
Leave it to churches (for religious folks) and civics organizations (for non-religious folks)! Everyone can follow their conscious!