Peace Talks: San Diego Mayor’s Race Hinges on Fish Story

I live in San Diego. Home of sun, fun, and pension fiascos. Like most places in America, we periodically elect a Mayor. This happens to be one of those years. And, boy, have things gotten serious. The big issue in San Diego Mayor’s race is what to do about a water gun fight that got out of hand in the City’s signature Balboa Park, trashed the Lilly Pond and scared the heck of out of innocent fish.

Had a big time Mayoral debate the next day. All the poobas where there. TV, newspaper, bloggers. The whole enchilada. Read all the coverage this morning. Very exciting. Seems one candidate blames the other candidate’s significant other for organizing the online invite to the squirt gun fight.

The accussor’s indignation was apparently matched only by the accuse’s impassioned denial of any involvement by relatives, friends, or known pets.

Apparently, the rising rate of real crime in the city’s core wasn’t a topic for the evening. Guess they didn’t talk about the city’s crumbling infrastructure. The massive pension deficit. The big budget Convention Center expansion plan. The Chargers leaving town. Not even the new terminal being constructed on the wrong side of the airport (you’d think someone would notice that).

Nope, according to all the news guys, the big issue was the Water gun fight. Who was responsible? Why weren’t the cops there to protect the fish?

Apparently, both of these clowns were consumed by condeming the “outrage” and distancing themselves from  the “criminal behavior”.

A WATER GUN FIGHT! Over 1000 people, nobody got hurt — not even the fish!

There could be as much as $10,000.00 in damage (not good — but hardly catastrophic). Those responsible will have to deal with the damage, but c’mon, this is the home of Over-the-Line and Comicon. And, its August and its HOT AS HELL!

Both of these guys were so consumed by their own egos and how they could capitalize on the “event” politically that they missed the obvious. What a real candidate for Mayor would have done is say, “hey it was a water gun fight. That’s cool. We should have more of those. And, isn’t it great that the cops were smart enough to NOT show up? (Imagine the criticism when things got rowdy and the cops moved in with batons and mace to protect the threatened fish.)”

“We’ll sort out who has to pay for the damage (in fact I’ll kick in $500 bucks). And, next time (wag finger here) lets be a little more careful. Isn’t it great that we live in a city where water gun-play is news. Lets lighten up and talk about something serious. Did you know that my opponent is actually from Jupiter?”

Don’t know which is worse, the candidates who take themselves too seriously or the media that is too dumb to notice. Or did I get that backwards.