You're Viewing the Archives
Return to IVN's Frontpage

Gun Control Debate: If I Were a Constitutional Attorney

by Ed Kowalski, published

I’m sorry to confess I’m getting tired of the gun law debate. I’m tired of the debating, not trying to find solutions.  So are another 10% of Americans, according to a recent poll that indicated favor for an assault rifle ban declined from 57% to 47.  Time is an effective amnesia inducer, which is why the NRA lobbyists probably do their best to grind legislation debate to a crawl.  (Not that Congress needs help with that.)

How difficult is it to pass some legislation to prevent the average Joe from owning weapons that belong nowhere but an action movie or a third-world revolution?!  I love your music, Nuge, but do you know how time-consuming it is to pick seventy shells out of a deer carcass?  I’ve heard of meat tenderizer, but come on.

The irony is that I’m a registered Independent specifically because I want more freedom, but in the case of guns I would not mind less freedom.  As an Independent I end up with less freedom anyway, like I’m not free to vote in both primaries; democracy at work.

I appreciate the argument of personal rights and a constitutional mandate, but the constitution was written when we were at war with England, which isn’t even called England anymore.  If Average Joe wants an assault rifle to go to Afghanistan and help out the Marines, go for it!  No one’s invading our soil, not officially, not North Korea yet, but Kim Jong Un claims to be weeks away from developing a gun that can fire.  In the meantime, we’re not defending our land from the attack of another country, and it doesn’t take thirty rounds to stop a home invader.

I’m not a constitutional attorney, but say I was, that might be my first point.

I’m not a gun owner either.  I’m also not a scuba diver, but I’d no sooner tell a gun enthusiast he has no right than I’d tell a diver he’s got some nerve swimming to fifty feet.  If, however, a scuba diver wanted to bring an automatic spear gun with thirty spear rapid fire capacity, I would definitely question his need and motives.

Not that I’m all in favor of the feds policing gun policy; to each state a different need.  Texas loves guns.  My home state of New Jersey, not so much, except Newark and Camden.  Congress could at least settle on background check legislation.  It’s literally easier for me to buy a gun than to get a credit card.

They could even pass conditional legislation with wording like, should the citizenry ever need to throw off the yolk of its own government, or if North Korea invades Alaska, the ban on assault rifles will be lifted.  Even the militias might be satisfied with that.  (Thanks in advance if North Korea ever invades.)

I’m just sick of the endless debating.  Pass something, do anything to make us and our children at least a little safer, or at least present the semblance of safer!

P.S., Piers Morgan, you’re not helping.  Yelling at gun enthusiasts doesn’t make you more sickened than the rest of us at shooting sprees, but I bet it helps ratings.

About the Author